Well, studies show (Brown, 2013) that people with narcissism market themselves in attractive, deceptive packages. One could wonder, then, how someone would find such an individual, someone who embodies these characteristics, attractive. Narcissism is defined as: excessive sense of self-importance over and above the needs of others grandiosity arrogance absence of ability to empathize and experience reciprocity in relationships intense need for admiration/attention to fill very low self-esteem impaired relationships resulting in parasitic/predatory behaviors designed to fill one’s self-esteem in the form of narcissistic supply (DSM-IV). In addition, although 75% of people with narcissism are found to be male, women can also be narcissists.
So just what traits does someone with narcissism have, and what does that person look like in the early stages of dating? Studies suggest that 1% of the general population (2-16% of psychiatric population) has narcissistic personality, while an even greater number exhibit typical traits of narcissism (Brown, 2013). For further study, please refer to the resources listed at the end of the article, as the subject is quite vast. The following is an attempt at a primer on such individuals.
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I feel I owe it to the people I work with in therapy, and others who may be in similar circumstances, to assist with educating the public about narcissistic abuse, so that people can be informed and aware of how to protect themselves in the event they encounter people with narcissistic traits.
My clients educated me about the aftermath of what it is to heal from narcissistic abuse. However, as time progressed, I found in my own therapy practice that, indeed, there exist some individuals on this planet with narcissistic challenges. I pride myself on being a strengths-focused therapist, in direct opposition of any of such disempowering diagnostic nomenclature. When I first heard the term narcissist as a graduate student, I had a hard time labeling someone with such a label. We often hear the term “ narcissist,” but what does it mean? From my vantage point as a psychotherapist, I work with many individuals who are leaving and healing from relationships, especially romantic ones, with people who are narcissists.
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